Interview with Marissa Stapley
Hi Marissa, first of all I’m very glad to meet you, thank you for your time. Let’s start with the questions.
Could you tell us how your passion for writing was born and when you decided to become a writer?
I can’t remember a time when I didn’t consider myself a writer. As a chid I was always writing and telling stories. My favourite author was L.M. Montgomery, who wrote the Anne of Green Gables series, which is very popular here in Canada. It’s about an orphan who deals with the hardships in her life by using her imagination. I identified with her so much; I was always living in my own world, too. I read the books over and over and dreamed of the books I would write. My paternal grandparents were both writers and my father is a journalist, so there was a lot of appreciation for writing in my family —and a great deal of support for me when I showed an interest.
I became an intern at the newspaper my dad worked when I was sixteen and that’s when I learned how to write — that it wasn’t all about imagination and passion, but also about efficiency and meeting deadlines and using fewer words to convey big ideas. Then, I went to university and earned a journalism degree, and I started working at various newspapers and magazines across the country. Somehow, a decade passed. I was married with a child and another one on the way, and I still hadn’t written a novel! So I came up with an idea and got to work. Of course, as is the case with many aspiring authors, that book didn’t end up being published, and nor did the next one I wrote. It was heartbreaking. But I didn’t give up. Writing is as much about persistence as it is about talent. It doesn’t matter how good you are if you don’t sit down and write every single day, even when you’re not sure you’re going to be published, even when it’s hard. When I stopped dreaming of writing and learned to be disciplined about my writing — in addition to being passionate about it — good things started to happen. Magical things. Then I was really a writer.
Is there a model that inspires you, a writer you love most?
Years ago, I was alone at a Muskoka cottage (this is an area of lakes in Ontario where many people spend their summers; it’s beautiful) labouring over scene in my debut novel about a character who is also alone at a Muskoka cottage when I stumbled upon Lauren Groff’s The Monsters of Templeton. It was tucked on a shelf between the Agatha Christie mysteries and the fisherman’s almanacs. Reading it distracted me from the fears that were tripping me up — What if no one wants to publish my novel? What if a snapping turtle bites me when I go swimming alone? Groff dragged my fears out of the depths and made them beautiful; my character started reading the novel too, and the story began to sing. Later, when I had secured a publishing contract, Groff graciously allowed me to excerpt her words. To say I’ve been a fan ever since is an understatement. Everything she writes is wonderful, and I find it comforting and inspiring to know her books are there for me whenever I need them.
I’m also inspired by the author friends I’ve met along the way. Writing is a solitary endeavour — and then, you finish the book, and you must come out and face the world. I don’t know what I’d do without colleagues to provide support when I need it, whether that means reading my work or coming to my events or simply being there when I need to talk. We all do this for each other (there are six of us, and we jokingly call ourselves ‘the coven’) and it has been such a gift to find this in the world.
In your novel “Things to do When it’s raining”, location is very important: why and how did you choose Alexandria Bay?
I have an aunt who is an actress and a singing teacher — very much like the Viv character in the novel — and I visited her a few times while I was coming up with the story. I knew I wanted the setting to be an inn, but wasn’t sure where, until I discovered my aunt’s community beside the St. Lawrence River. One afternoon, we took a river cruise and as I looked out at all those islands, some of them so tiny all they could fit was just one cabin, and learned some of the river stories, especially the ones about the rare people who live on the river all year long, the characters began to take shape. I recently visited that town again and it was a very emotional experience for me. It felt like I was living inside the book. I was sure I’d meet the characters as I walked the streets of the town or wandered beside the river. The fact that they didn’t appear made me quite sad!
Mae, Gabe, Lilly and George are four very realistic characters, with their strengths and weaknesses, with their fears that lead them to commit some errors. Why did you choose to create such realistic characters?
I don’t know that I choose to — it feels I have no choice. These people come to live in my mind and they’re very real. They’re wonderful, but like all real people they have their flaws. It begins to feel like my most important job to find a way to convey them to the world in all their strengths and weaknesses. I’m often told my characters feel like real people. I think it comes from having — or at least seeking to have — a deep understanding of human nature. I’m constantly observing people and listening to people — perhaps when I shouldn’t. And I ask too many questions; I always have. I’m always trying to find out exactly why people do the things they do and make sense not just of the ways people love each other but of the ways they hurt each other and make mistakes. People are always making mistakes. I make mistakes every day! I find myself frustrated by novels where everything is straightforward and the decisions the characters make come easily. That’s not real life!
Which is the character you are connected with most? My favorite one is grandpa George, I understood all his choices and I really felt emotionally close to him.
I love that Grandpa George is your favourite! That makes me very happy. I felt connected with him, too. He is loosely based on my own grandfather, who was not related to me biologically but who loved me and took care of me just the same. It’s hard for me to choose a character I connected most with in this novel. Perhaps, like children, they are all my favourites for different reasons. (And perhaps, like children, they all secretly believe they’re the favourite?) So far, I’ve always written novels with ensemble casts, and I find I invest in each character equally. It can be a bit exhausting! I’m looking forward to the day I come up with a book idea that has only one central character.
Among the characters, which is the one who looks like you most? Did you find inspiration from real people to characterize them?
Mae would probably be the one who is most like me. And I did draw inspiration for George, Lilly and Everett from my own grandparents, but they were really just the seeds that started the story. In the end, these characters are nothing like the real people I knew. That’s the way it always goes. A book can’t become real until you let go of real life, if that makes sense! And, yes, I do draw inspiration from real people to create my characters, but it’s from every person I have ever met, every story I have ever heard, every emotion I have ever felt. That’s what being a writer is for me: filtering real life onto the page. But it’s never any one moment or person in particular. My husband often recognizes small moments or stories from our lives, but I don’t realize I’m doing it in the moment. He says it makes him smile to see us there in tiny ways.
In your novel “Things to Do When It’s Raining”, secrets, lies and half-truths disrupt characters’ lives. Do you think it’s fair to tell lies with good purposes?
An important moment in the novel is when Lilly is standing alone by the window looking at the river and thinking about how, in life, some things are meant to be kept secret and some are not. The trick is to know which is which, she observes. To be honest, she’s terrible at choosing the right moments — but still, I’ve always felt this way about secrets and so I often felt great sympathy for her struggle. People have this tendency to want to reveal everything about themselves to the person they want to love them. I think they do this because they hope that if they are seen fully and loved anyway, all will be well. I’ve done this, not just with lovers but also with friends and relatives. And I’ve learned that actually, it’s okay to have a private life. It’s okay not to be fully understood in every single way. I think having a few secrets is the only way a person can truly come to love herself. So I do think it’s okay, perhaps not necessarily to tell lies but to sometimes hold back a little of yourself. And sometimes, you may need to hold back some of the truth to protect another person’s feelings. That’s okay, too. However, keeping secrets can also cause a lot of pain. And Lilly is right: it’s hard to know when it’s important to be honest and when it’s important to be discreet. I’m still learning, and I learned right along with my characters. I want to have my secret places, but I don’t want to shut out or hurt the people I love.
Another important theme in the book is second chances. I think you believe in them yourself. Have you ever given a second chance and, then, had regrets?
I understand, perhaps more than other people, that human beings are flawed. It’s impossible to have a relationship with another person without one day being hurt or disappointed by them. So I do firmly believe in second chances — maybe even third or fourth! But within reason. You can come to understand a person’s flaws and weaknesses and love them anyway, and know that they love you, too. But if a person is hurting you profoundly — no matter that their cruelty comes from cruelty inflicted on them, the way Jonah’s did — you have to protect yourself above all else. There are difficult and necessary moments when it’s time to walk away and never look back.